Dear God,
Please accept my sincere apologies for taking your name in vain for the past 45 minutes as I tore this house apart looking for my lost Weight Watchers manual. I recognize that you had nothing to do with it and that it was my own slovenly habits that caused it to be lost. That, and the fact that I feel I must hide things away so that my clean freak of a husband won't set it in what he feels is the proper place (I would appreciate a little help in that regard as well).
Given that we are made in your image, I realize how you may be slightly appalled at my interpretation of that and apologize for that as well. That's why I was looking for the f-ing thing in the first place. Also, please help me lose 25 pounds as easily as I lost this manual.
Amen.
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