Humiliating Moment #1334

These boots are made for kicking...
(me right in the arse and when I'm down)!

The good news is that we've been invited to a friend's Vermont ski house this coming weekend. I haven't skied in a long while and have rather ancient gear. However, my ski boots must've shrunk about a half size and so my husband convinced me it was time to take the plunge and update my gear.

Two things have been keeping me from doing this: the cost and the fact that to properly adjust the ski bindings, I must provide my weight to a perfect stranger. While I resist spending money on most non-essentials, we did come into a little inheritance late last year and so technically speaking, I wouldn't be dipping into savings. Still, this is a splurge but one my husband - a ski fanatic - has been nagging me to take. I have also made up my mind to get out of my comfort zone this year as I'm beginning to feel and act like an old fart. This also factored big into my finally agreeing to weigh-in in a public area (caution: do not attempt this maneuver unless it is actually related to your safety).

It turns out that weighing-in wasn't my only problem: the size of my calves were too!! Wha..??!! It's true - I couldn't fit my lower leg into the standard ski boot and had to SETTLE for the only pair left in the store that could adjust to my size (and just how much of my overweight life has centered around settling for things I really don't want?!). And they're fugly orange! I had gone too far to turn back now and so just went with them. At least they're too ugly to steal.

Coming into the home stretch at the cash register, I was fully aware that weight had not entered the conversation yet - even though I spied a small scale in the corner. But hey - it's been so long since I've bought ski gear, maybe technology has finally caught up to my modesty level. No such luck. We were in the car just about to pull away from the store and the clerk came running out, needing my ability level, height and, you guessed it, weight. Oh perfect - in front of my husband, no less! Why don't I just undress here in the parking lot - that might be a tad less humiliating. I told hubby to hum a tune to himself and tried my very best to act nonchalant about it to the clerk. Bless him for not saying "whoa!" or "try a salad" in response.

Another negative was that once the boots were off and for most of the day, my varicose veins started in with their primal screaming. Well, none of this was proving to be a very positive experience at all - screw this "going outside of my comfort zone". Except that it made me have a good talk with myself about getting serious again when it comes to losing more weight. The varicose veins are not going away on their own and neither are these continued humiliating moments unless I do something about them. So let's see just how serious I really get.

Thanks to everyone who left a suggestion about jump-starting this fitness mindset of mine that seems to have gone missing over the holidays. You had so many good ones. Jumping in and doing it plus building on one good day at a time is where I'm headed.

Happy Monday!